Trust me, you said.
Do not dwell on the past,
this time will be different,
our love is meant to last.
Trust me, you said.
Let me kiss away your tears
and be the one champion
that can soothe away your fears.
Trust me, you said.
Hand over your frail heart
and I’ll keep it safe always,
even if we’re worlds apart.
Trust me, you said.
Let me take you as my wife
and as my joyous tears fell
you plunged in the knife.
You ransacked my soul,
then left me for dead;
violated and alone.
Trust me, you said.
I am on a poetry kick lately, it seems. The poem above was written in honor of Valentine’s Day (which I despise. Boo! Hiss!) and for the Trifecta Challenge. This week’s challenge calls for contestants to write a story or poem between 33 and 333 words in length that feature the word: Dwell. It can’t be just any definition of dwell. It must be the third definition which is to keep the attention directed at or to speak or write insistently upon. For more information on the Trifecta Challenge follow the link above.
oh wow. I truly loved this, it cut right to the heart of how our feelings can betray us, of how our best gut feelings can be wrong, how trusting the wrong person can be disasterous.
the language you used was wonderful for such a heartbreaking tale. WELL DONE.
“the language you used was wonderful for such a heartbreaking tale” Thank you. I tend to keep my writing very simple. Not sure why, I guess it’s just my style.
{clapping wildly} I picture this being read out loud from a creepy old armchair as the starter to one of the old Saturday horror flicks or late-night horror movies! Great stuff!
Thank you! 🙂
Delightfully indignant. Well-written piece with excellent voice and phraseology. Well done.
“Well-written piece with excellent voice and phraseology.” Thanks. I find writing more traditional style poetry fun from time to time and can really churn out some rather amusing ditties and poems. Glad you liked this one 🙂
This is so perfect!It is what many of us have gone through-how I hate those words”trust me”!Wonderful piece of writing & it shook me up-loved the pics too:-)
how I hate those words”trust me”
Me too, they fill me with abject dread.
:-)But ,I still am a sop for romance,ha!ha!
Me too. I have a weird love for trashy historical romance novels.
lol!No hope for us,eh?;-)
Nope, I am a pretty hopeless case 😉
Me too!
Very strong poetry. And I hope there are good men out there. Trust me should never be said, it should be felt
Of course there are good men out there! There are just a whole lot of men and women out there that are not so good, and some downright conniving vultures that look for broken people to exploit but what are you going to do. Human nature isn’t all rainbows and sunshine, I guess.
Nicely written!
Why thank you kindly. It’s not as amusing as cock carving but it’ll do 🙂
Whoa! I love that ending!
Thanks, I wrote the ending first and then wrote the rest. I rarely ever do it that way but this time I got the inspiration, saw where it was heading and said I’m finishing on this note.
Oh for the love of Mike! Starting with the beautiful image of lovers beneath the Eiffel Tower (I love the Eiffel Tower… have you read “Murder on the Eiffel Tower”?), and then such a lovely poem (I was thinking of flowering tributes for your beautiful words, ever mindful of the background on your blog, as I read)… and then reality set in at the end… with apropos dead roses. ‘Trust Me’, really? That’s when you don’t.
Well put together piece, MM.
p.s. Happy Valentine’s Day…
Thanks for the props, Sorry I tricked you there for a bit into thinking it was going to have a happy ending. I don’t do many of those 😉 Happy manufactured card, flowers, and candy day to you as well!
This was really good! I am amazed by your talent.
Thanks. This is one of my favorite poems, thus far 🙂
Kick Ass Poem! Loved It!
Funny I was just talking with my sweety about the word trust and that phrase “Trust Me”
Funny that. Trust me is the type of phrase people should only use if they want me to trust them less…. Actions bring trust, not words.
Oh my, this really grips you and doesn’t let go. Very power and heartbreaking emotions.
Thanks. Being mistreated by people we have an intimate connection to can really change a person, and not always for the better. Glad you enjoyed the poem 🙂
i knew it! very wary of people who say “trust me” a lot >< you captured something that so real, so heartbreaking and so many can probably relate to. very well-written ^^
I think most people know heartbreak in one form or another but being tricked adds an additional swift kick to one’s ego, for certain. Thanks for taking the time to read and comment 🙂
ooooh plunge the knife i valentine’s nice ……
Yeah, back stabs are the worst.
“This time will be different” — how many of us have fallen for that? I know I have. Nicely done.
Too many Annabelle…. too many. Damn those charismatic charmers that make you throw caution to the wind!
ha! we must be on the same anti-Valentine page this week 🙂 I’ll drop mine in the torrid pile tomorrow.
“ha! we must be on the same anti-Valentine page this week” Glad to know I am not alone in my Valentine’s Day dislike.
Wonderful poem! Dark, but so descriptive of the type of relationship many of us encounter, and if we’re lucky, hobble away from.
I’m not a Valentine’s Day fan either (and it’s not ’cause I’m bitter and alone….I’m happily married! It’s more about it being a contrived commercial holiday where the utterances don’t mean nearly as much as an “I love you” any other day of the year.)
Yay! Another fellow member of the cupid hater’s club. Awesome. I am not single either, so I hear you. My personal reason for disliking ‘that day’ on top of the commercialism is that I have never had a good one. Something bad always befalls me on that cursed day. I hate to see what awaits me this year 😦
This is very good. I like your poetry kicks (:
Thank you!
I’ve been there before. Mean lovers. Great words.
Sorry you’ve known that unloving feeling. People like that are real pieces of ‘work’.
This is an incredibly stark, but beautiful poem. Nicely done!
That’s life, I guess. There’s some real ugliness but there’s also exquisite beauty in the world, kinda like this poem. Thank you for reading my poem 🙂
I really enjoyed this. I love that your writing style is “keeping it simple” as you said in a comment above. Most of the time I find poetry completely inaccessible to me. I was never educated in the form and often just find myself intimidated when I try to read it. This was beautifully constructed. It built as a full and complete story. The ending ripped my heart out, as well. Bravo! (I, too, hate Valentine’s Day). 😉
“Most of the time I find poetry completely inaccessible to me. I was never educated in the form and often just find myself intimidated when I try to read it. ” Don’t feel bad. There is so much awful, nonsensical, crap that passes for poetry these days it’s staggering. It’s sad to see how the depthless jargon that quasi-intellectuals eat up has made so many people really dislike poetry.
Glad to have you a member of the valentine’s day hate club! 🙂
This is fantastic! I love the rhythm and the pace. You take the reader to that brutal ending so smoothly. Well done!
Thank you for the compliment. I had a few more stanzas that I nixed because it made the pacing seem to slow. Glad you think it’s on track 🙂
The sweet beginning and easy rhyme make the knife in the back just that much more sudden. *gasp*
[Valentine’s Day: another opportunity to miss him]
I’m glad it was a sudden jolt…. most knives in the back are.
Thanks for reading 🙂
Trust me… when someone says that I go rigid… same thing when someone says, Relax…the opposite occurs. I like your version of Valentine’s Day much better than Hallmark’s.
“Trust me… when someone says that I go rigid” In the nineties there was a motto a professional wrestler used called DTA: Don’t Trust Anybody. I’ve made that my mantra and whenever I have strayed from it, I have paid for it.
“I like your version of Valentine’s Day much better than Hallmark’s.” Thank you. I’m a sentimental idiot that loves cards…. just not on Valentine’s Day.
This is a wonderful poem. I love that it rhymes too! I’m glad you’re on a poetry kick because I’d love to read more! 😀
Thank you!